CDC Announces Zombie Survival Preparedness Plan

With all of the strangeness on the horizon, the CDC has announced it will be taking on yet another global catastrophe on everyone’s mind, no matter how unlikely some are saying it may be.  The zombie apocalypse, which some are now taking very seriously – even buying up million dollar zombie proof homes, has been on the CDC’s mind and they have posted a plan to survive it.  With much of the candor and seriousness it uses to deal with many other things, on the CDC’s website there is actually a plan for what the CDC would do in the event of a global zombie apocalypse.  And it doesn’t end there.

It’s the same horror film fueled conversation so many millions have had it has almost become a right of passage for an entire generation.  What are we doing to prepare for a potential threat from the undead?  Just as people are preparing for Earthquakes, Tsunamis, and in some cases nuclear catastrophes – they are preparing for an appearance in the next incarnation of the ultimate supernatural reanimation of the undead.  And while it doesn’t give specific details on the types of zombies or what to do to incapacitate them, it has made an official list of items to stockpile in order to prepare.

Although the CDC’s list doesn’t list any of the traditional and most interesting means of zombie dispatching.  There are no creative tips for garden shears or how to turn your family sedan into a roving zombie smashing tank.  It’s clear why a government agency like the CDC would be apprehensive to tell people to stockpile barbed wire to wrap around the grill of their neighbors’ pickup truck to better combat the zombie menace, but it seems the CDC’s plan for a zombie apocalypse may not be as comprehensive as the current bible of zombie survivalists – The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks.

It is, however, interesting to think so many people are taking the idea of a zombie apocalypse seriously – to the point where the CDC finds it something worth looking into.  Some may criticize the waste of resources that went into the simple blog post, but zombie survival does get people into the mindset of surviving in general, thinking on your feet, and carefully moving so as not to attract the attention of the undead hordes.  It gets readers used to the idea that at any moment madness could erupt and make hiding the only option.  It’s a very similar problem to any other mob action where safety in numbers is not always the case.

So what does the CDC say it will plan on doing if zombies attack?  Not unlike when dealing with any other disease, the CDC will likely begin by conducting investigations, collecting samples (ie zombies), quarantining as best they can (likely entire cities), and attempting to determine a cure to the mysterious disease.  As a final note the CDC did not mention that everyone already knows the cure to zombie-ism.  It’s the one word of advice that’s in every zombie film since the original Night of the Living Dead terrorized movie goers on the silver screen.